Sunday, December 7, 2008

Midnight

If last week wasn't midnight for Brettderella, is was 11:59:59 PM. The clock gonged mercilessly at about 7pm ET tonight. Actually it wasn't even really a Cinderella story. That would imply that Brett was good-looking and had a nice dress and glass slippers for at least a little while. The story goes more like this:

Homely Brett's hot stepsisters are forced or are nice enough to let him/her tag along on nights out to swanky clubs. Inspite of her unrefined-ness (spitting tobacco, farting, burping, drinking Bailey's and Rumpelminz) she gets a fair amount of hookups from dudes who "jump on the grenade" for their friends. Since it takes a truly special person to jump on a grenade, there are very few of them, and most won't do it twice especially within a few months of each other. They've been to all the clubs in town, nobody is grenade jumping and the hot stepsisters can't get any anymore now either.

I won't go into details about all the missed deep throws. Normally we try one per game and maybe my analysis was based on small samples. Today there were plenty. They were near nobody, except for the one that was picked in garbage time.

The Jets got beat today by a guy who knew his offense and could make all the throws necessary to implement it. I wish we had a QB with one of those abilities.

The Niners' TD that was called back due to holding on the Niners was a beautiful throw over one defender's outstreched arms and in front of two or three other defenders . Favre has not made one of those all year and probably cannot make one seeing as he lacks any semblance of touch and the ability to throw the ball in three dimensional space as opposed to lasers that travel in a two dimensional plane. Another great throw was made on the Niners' last TD over a defender and in front of the sideline and endline.

Who made these throws? Some guy named Shaun Hill. Either that guy is the best QB in the league or Brett Favre is "maybe the 50th best quarterback...in Georgia".

Now, just to pile on:

Why call a timeout on 3rd and 21 from what, the 15-ish yardline? You are not going to get a first down there. Go to 3rd and 26 and run your idiot proof draw, screen, scramble, etc. Bonehead. A team capable in competing in that game might have needed that timeout later.

The Brad Smith latteral on the kick-off shows no faith in the QB to bring you down the field in a timely manner. If it was a play called by the coaches, the coaches have no faith (I already believe this). If it was Brad Smith's idea, the players have no faith.

Soundtrack for tonight:

"Going, going, back, back, to Missi-ssippi" by Notorious I.N.T.

Don't let the door hit you in the ass...

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